On death and dying, questions and points & beliefs

Do you know the value of "a day"? For this girl there will come a day.....one never knows when, which is the point of this posting for the dear old blog. We all hold different beliefs, we all cling to our own beliefs tenaciously, do not let others doubts enter this territory for your very real self, one day you who perhaps have been vibrant at times will be extinguished as a candle, you will simply go out. When you go out follow your own very real path.....it may be another wonderful adventure, it may be the portal of beautifully colored lights for for this gal, it may be the great re-union you hoped for and perceived from Ma's talkings in that deep sleep she entered which sounded like they were slowly all hooking up and her finding them after all of these longs years, a reunion you actually believed in since you could walk and talk, and they took you the graveyards and you believed in tea parties and smiles and hugs of all of them reuniting, one of your first very vivid images, maybe it will be all true, all very real, that story remains to be seen and felt, and I smile for that. For the ones in this real time life we love who are still here after we step through the portal, well it become important for your husband, son, brothers, adopted siblings, and friends to know you loved them as much as you were capable of, you forgive them for any wrongful things they put in your path, and that you hope they forgive you too for where you floundered or did wrong to them, especially some of the life altering/shape shifting items, sometimes done with thought, and sometimes done in error without the proper thought they demanded-these actions which might have wrongly impacted anothers life. You wish to let them know that you usually tried your best to do the right thing, for them, for the household, for their souls, for their needs or cares. And the acquaintances, well they are in a separate category, but you tried your best there too, whether to provoke thought, or to impact maybe a self pitying moment or trauma they had suffered, you usually tried to give back much more than you took. And for the ones that really count, you hope they remember that you'd want them to remain strong, to re-group and to go on valuing all of these days ahead as they value the ones that have past into memories. You hope they will remember your better points, your better stories, and gain a strength from them, you hope they will keep some of your values, some of your lessons on how they could chose to behave, you especially hope they remember the first law of physics: "To every action, there is reaction": you hope they remember this when interacting with each other, and all of the ones they love, too. You look at them, your looking back, you must go, you must go on alone for awhile. I believe I will see you again....at some point, I believe I will wait in my own time frame for you, so I will not say goodbye either, I will simply say: "I'll see you, later"! I loved you solidly.